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Oct. 1st, 2003 10:08 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
tammaiyaWe have new wall units, I've been assembling furniture and setting up electronics, I got a hair cut, I bought a pack of proper tarot cards, I've been knitting, parents are seriously considering moving on the basis that they're getting too old to tend to the house and garden which TRULY scares me as I've lived in this house for my whole life, and Adrian has somehow got his own fanclub. There is also more Celtic Cross.
Jack Sparrow had, on occasion, been accused of being perpetually drunk. Now, this was not strictly true; he affected a tipsy manner, but it was all an act. It brought to mind, for example, the attempt he made on Elizabeth on that desert island. He thanked his lucky stars every day that he hadn’t succeeded, as not only would it complicate things, the girl would probably have killed him where he laid the day after. All in all, Jack was just as capable of getting utterly smashed as the next man.
Well, usually. Not in this case, however. Jack strongly doubted that there was a man alive who could get so rollicking drunk on so little alcohol as dear William. The boy couldn’t hold his liquor to save his life, which sadly, as a pirate, it might. This would have to fixed, Jack decided. Not without some pain, of course. Hangovers were rather nasty. Then again, no pain, no gain.
It was so tempting to just seize the moment, as it were, and take advantage of the very drunk Will. However, that would mar the triumph of his eventual conquest, and it would be short-lived victory anyway. If he rushed in now, Will would probably never forgive him. Or would take a lot of time and effort before he did. No, stick to the plan, that was best. “Will,” Jack began brightly. “You are right soddin’ pissed. We’d best be getting’ ye home, eh?”
“M’ not drunk,” Will declared sullenly.
“Oh, yes?” Jack asked in amusement. “Let’s see ye prove it, then.”
Staggering to his feet, Will stood there swaying for a few seconds with a triumphant look. “See?” As soon as he attempted to take a step, however, his legs buckled and he collapsed into the waiting arms of Jack.
Jack smirked. “I certainly do. Ye are t’ sobriety what I am t’ sanity, lad.”
“Bu’ y’re no’ sane,” Will protested, slurring his words to the point of near incoherency.
Jack sniggered. “Funny, tha’. Sling ye’re arm round me shoulder- righ’, tha’ssa boy. Let’s get you home, shall we?”
“D’n wanna g’ home,” Will muttered mutinously.
“Righ’, righ’. Tha’s lovely, Will. I’m sure I care,” Jack commented dismissively. “Ye’d best be gettin' on before you get in trouble with ye’re precious Miss Swann, I’d say.”
Will considered this in the deep and contemplative way which only the truly inebriated can do, and eventually reached a conclusion. “Sod Miss Swann.”
“I’ll be sure to remind ye that ye said tha’ tomorrow, lad,” Jack told him cheerfully. “But I’d really rather tha’ ye didn’t, if ye don’t mind.”
Will blinked, wits muddied to sheer lack of comprehension by drink. “Wha’?”
“Oh, nothing,” Jack said airily, propelling Will gently but steadily towards the door. “We’ll jus’ be leavin’ this fine establishment, then. Cheerio!”
“I c’n walk myself, y’know!” Will complained as Jack all but dragged him down the streets back to the Smithery.
“Yes, I’m sure ye can,” Jack murmured. “An’ amusin’ as it would be t’ see ye try, I’d rather not. Step lively! I’d prefer not to be holdin’ back yer hair in a public place while ye do be pukin’, lad. Got a reputation t’ be maintainin’, an’ all tha’.”
“I won’ puke,” Will argued, stumbling slightly only to be righted by Jack.
“All I’m sayin’ is ye may be singin’ t’ another tune in a wee bit o’ time, Will,” Jack idly commented. “Ah, good. We’re ‘ere. Careful o’ the step, mind ye.”
Snorting with disgust, Will drew himself up to his full height. “This’s my Smithy, it is. I know all about th’ step!” Shoving Jack away, he staggered inside and half-fell into the wall.
“William Turner,” Elizabeth snapped irately. “You’re absolutely off your face with drink!”
Will stared at her blankly. “Why do people keep sayin’ tha’? ‘M not! S’ all lies! Slander!”
“All who?” Elizabeth sighed.
“Jack.” Will frowned. “He’s really rather mean, y’know.”
Elizabeth opened her mouth to point out that Jack was far away and that Will was delusional, but at that precise moment the pirate in question came swaggering in.
“Will, who on Earth are ye talkin’-” He stopped abruptly as he noticed Elizabeth. “Oh, blast.” Elizabeth raised an eyebrow. Jack quickly realised the error of his ways, and wandered towards her with an ingratiating smile and his arms spread out in welcome. “Elizabeth, lass! How’s life been treatin’ ye, then?”
Without saying a word, Elizabeth slapped him hard across the cheek with a resounding crack. Jack’s head rocked back with the blow, and he rubbed his stinging face with a wince. “Ow.”
“Would you say you deserved that?” Will asked curiously.
“Dunno wha’ it was for, yet!” Jack grumbled.
“For not coming back sooner, you miserable scoundrel!” Elizabeth seethed.
Jack’s brow furrowed with complete confusion. “Huh?” He shot a perplexed glance at Will, who shrugged.
“Oh, you’re both drunk, you hopeless pirates!” Elizabeth exclaimed angrily. “Just you wait, you’ll be wishing you’d never even heard the word rum tomorrow.”
“I don’ get ‘angovers,” Jack told her smugly.
Elizabeth narrowed her eyes. “Really. How nice for you. You’ll still wish you hadn’t heard the word rum. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’ll be back to give you both a talking to later, mark my words!”
Jack cringed, twiddling his fingers nervously and rocking back and forth on his heels. “Er, consider them marked.”
Elizabeth’s glare intensified. “Don’t you even think about making a run for it, Jack Sparrow!”
“It’s Captain-” Jack started, but withered under Elizabeth’s expression. “Right, then,” he muttered. Not that he would have left anyway. Not without Will. That would be giving in, and Jack Sparrow did not give in.
“Good,” she hissed, and she swept past him in a flurry of skirts out the door.
The two men stood in silence for a few minutes, staring in shock after the departed Elizabeth. Finally, Will spoke. “What was that about?”
“Haven’t the foggiest, me boy,” Jack answered faintly.
Jack Sparrow had, on occasion, been accused of being perpetually drunk. Now, this was not strictly true; he affected a tipsy manner, but it was all an act. It brought to mind, for example, the attempt he made on Elizabeth on that desert island. He thanked his lucky stars every day that he hadn’t succeeded, as not only would it complicate things, the girl would probably have killed him where he laid the day after. All in all, Jack was just as capable of getting utterly smashed as the next man.
Well, usually. Not in this case, however. Jack strongly doubted that there was a man alive who could get so rollicking drunk on so little alcohol as dear William. The boy couldn’t hold his liquor to save his life, which sadly, as a pirate, it might. This would have to fixed, Jack decided. Not without some pain, of course. Hangovers were rather nasty. Then again, no pain, no gain.
It was so tempting to just seize the moment, as it were, and take advantage of the very drunk Will. However, that would mar the triumph of his eventual conquest, and it would be short-lived victory anyway. If he rushed in now, Will would probably never forgive him. Or would take a lot of time and effort before he did. No, stick to the plan, that was best. “Will,” Jack began brightly. “You are right soddin’ pissed. We’d best be getting’ ye home, eh?”
“M’ not drunk,” Will declared sullenly.
“Oh, yes?” Jack asked in amusement. “Let’s see ye prove it, then.”
Staggering to his feet, Will stood there swaying for a few seconds with a triumphant look. “See?” As soon as he attempted to take a step, however, his legs buckled and he collapsed into the waiting arms of Jack.
Jack smirked. “I certainly do. Ye are t’ sobriety what I am t’ sanity, lad.”
“Bu’ y’re no’ sane,” Will protested, slurring his words to the point of near incoherency.
Jack sniggered. “Funny, tha’. Sling ye’re arm round me shoulder- righ’, tha’ssa boy. Let’s get you home, shall we?”
“D’n wanna g’ home,” Will muttered mutinously.
“Righ’, righ’. Tha’s lovely, Will. I’m sure I care,” Jack commented dismissively. “Ye’d best be gettin' on before you get in trouble with ye’re precious Miss Swann, I’d say.”
Will considered this in the deep and contemplative way which only the truly inebriated can do, and eventually reached a conclusion. “Sod Miss Swann.”
“I’ll be sure to remind ye that ye said tha’ tomorrow, lad,” Jack told him cheerfully. “But I’d really rather tha’ ye didn’t, if ye don’t mind.”
Will blinked, wits muddied to sheer lack of comprehension by drink. “Wha’?”
“Oh, nothing,” Jack said airily, propelling Will gently but steadily towards the door. “We’ll jus’ be leavin’ this fine establishment, then. Cheerio!”
“I c’n walk myself, y’know!” Will complained as Jack all but dragged him down the streets back to the Smithery.
“Yes, I’m sure ye can,” Jack murmured. “An’ amusin’ as it would be t’ see ye try, I’d rather not. Step lively! I’d prefer not to be holdin’ back yer hair in a public place while ye do be pukin’, lad. Got a reputation t’ be maintainin’, an’ all tha’.”
“I won’ puke,” Will argued, stumbling slightly only to be righted by Jack.
“All I’m sayin’ is ye may be singin’ t’ another tune in a wee bit o’ time, Will,” Jack idly commented. “Ah, good. We’re ‘ere. Careful o’ the step, mind ye.”
Snorting with disgust, Will drew himself up to his full height. “This’s my Smithy, it is. I know all about th’ step!” Shoving Jack away, he staggered inside and half-fell into the wall.
“William Turner,” Elizabeth snapped irately. “You’re absolutely off your face with drink!”
Will stared at her blankly. “Why do people keep sayin’ tha’? ‘M not! S’ all lies! Slander!”
“All who?” Elizabeth sighed.
“Jack.” Will frowned. “He’s really rather mean, y’know.”
Elizabeth opened her mouth to point out that Jack was far away and that Will was delusional, but at that precise moment the pirate in question came swaggering in.
“Will, who on Earth are ye talkin’-” He stopped abruptly as he noticed Elizabeth. “Oh, blast.” Elizabeth raised an eyebrow. Jack quickly realised the error of his ways, and wandered towards her with an ingratiating smile and his arms spread out in welcome. “Elizabeth, lass! How’s life been treatin’ ye, then?”
Without saying a word, Elizabeth slapped him hard across the cheek with a resounding crack. Jack’s head rocked back with the blow, and he rubbed his stinging face with a wince. “Ow.”
“Would you say you deserved that?” Will asked curiously.
“Dunno wha’ it was for, yet!” Jack grumbled.
“For not coming back sooner, you miserable scoundrel!” Elizabeth seethed.
Jack’s brow furrowed with complete confusion. “Huh?” He shot a perplexed glance at Will, who shrugged.
“Oh, you’re both drunk, you hopeless pirates!” Elizabeth exclaimed angrily. “Just you wait, you’ll be wishing you’d never even heard the word rum tomorrow.”
“I don’ get ‘angovers,” Jack told her smugly.
Elizabeth narrowed her eyes. “Really. How nice for you. You’ll still wish you hadn’t heard the word rum. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’ll be back to give you both a talking to later, mark my words!”
Jack cringed, twiddling his fingers nervously and rocking back and forth on his heels. “Er, consider them marked.”
Elizabeth’s glare intensified. “Don’t you even think about making a run for it, Jack Sparrow!”
“It’s Captain-” Jack started, but withered under Elizabeth’s expression. “Right, then,” he muttered. Not that he would have left anyway. Not without Will. That would be giving in, and Jack Sparrow did not give in.
“Good,” she hissed, and she swept past him in a flurry of skirts out the door.
The two men stood in silence for a few minutes, staring in shock after the departed Elizabeth. Finally, Will spoke. “What was that about?”
“Haven’t the foggiest, me boy,” Jack answered faintly.
